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 Untitled! Bonus Stories!, It's finally here!
Gloria
Posted: Apr 4, 05:36:33 AM


Meanwhile, the squirrels are plotting...
*

Group: Admin
Posts: 1,937
Member No.: 5
Joined: Nov 22, 2003





http://untitled.comicgen.com/ustories.html

Well, the first one's up!

Feel free to use this thread for discussion, comments, etc. If you find any typos that I missed please let me know!

ENJOY!


--------------------
"IRC is just multiplayer notepad."

"You ate the last Harpagornis! Noooo!"

It's not called "300" because of the number of Spartans...it's called "300" because that's the number of stars a rational person gives it. - Doug TenNapel
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Crash
Posted: Apr 4, 12:57:31 PM


Keeper of the Weasel-Stick
*

Group: Admin
Posts: 1,082
Member No.: 3
Joined: Nov 22, 2003



Yay!! *downloads*


--------------------
Admit nothing.
Deny everything.
Demand proof.

--The flight instructor's creed
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coastal_artist
Posted: Apr 5, 01:54:30 PM


Xe's Secret Licker
*

Group: Members
Posts: 471
Member No.: 10
Joined: Nov 23, 2003



Yay! More U! Poor Fiar never seems to get a break. And I want to know where Twap and Keer were, but since I remember sketches from another culture, I'm sure we'll find out. And what's Fiar actually doing life/job-wise? Maybe I read the story too fast and just missed it... twapdry.gif

Do all the stories take place more or less at the same time? Or is there a specific order to them?

With typos, the thing that I noticed was misused end punctuation in dialogue. Sometimes it's missing, and sometimes there's a period instead of a comma before a "s/he said" dialogue tag.


--------------------
The smallest feline is a masterpiece.
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Gloria
Posted: Apr 5, 09:52:07 PM


Meanwhile, the squirrels are plotting...
*

Group: Admin
Posts: 1,937
Member No.: 5
Joined: Nov 22, 2003



Ah, thanks for the heads up on the punctuation, coasty. I thought I fixed most of those but I probably missed quite a few. The cutting and shifting around of blocks of text I did during editing probably aggravated the situation.


The story didn't mention what Fiar's doing, really. I probably should have written that in. Since this story takes place a few months after the end of U! I kind of figured people would assume he's still tying up loose ends with VZ and working with the new government there.

I wrote the stories in a vaguely chronological order but for the most part they are independant of one another.

Thanks for reading!


--------------------
"IRC is just multiplayer notepad."

"You ate the last Harpagornis! Noooo!"

It's not called "300" because of the number of Spartans...it's called "300" because that's the number of stars a rational person gives it. - Doug TenNapel
Top
louisth
Posted: Apr 9, 08:07:28 AM


mini-muffin
*

Group: Members
Posts: 6
Member No.: 156
Joined: Sep 12, 2006



Read it! Enjoyed it! Hungry for more!

Poor Snitter. The cute guy is too busy chasing the girl who hates him to notice her. twapwink.gif Maybe I'll be a Timmi/Snitter shipper. That would be a cute couple. twapsmile.gif
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Gloria
Posted: Apr 10, 05:37:14 AM


Meanwhile, the squirrels are plotting...
*

Group: Admin
Posts: 1,937
Member No.: 5
Joined: Nov 22, 2003



Well, being a Timmi/Snits shipper is infinitely better than being a Timmi/Jamie shipper. XD



--------------------
"IRC is just multiplayer notepad."

"You ate the last Harpagornis! Noooo!"

It's not called "300" because of the number of Spartans...it's called "300" because that's the number of stars a rational person gives it. - Doug TenNapel
Top
Medieval Pete
Posted: Apr 21, 10:13:33 PM


Pillages Castles in the Sky
*

Group: Members
Posts: 2,326
Member No.: 46
Joined: Jan 26, 2004



I'm still interested to see the direction that the &/Phase/Xi storyline takes. suppose I'l have to wait untill next nanowrimo for that one... unless theres something I overlooked.
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Gloria
Posted: Apr 22, 06:52:12 AM


Meanwhile, the squirrels are plotting...
*

Group: Admin
Posts: 1,937
Member No.: 5
Joined: Nov 22, 2003



There are 4 more stories I have to edit and post, Pete. twapsmile.gif This was just the first one.


--------------------
"IRC is just multiplayer notepad."

"You ate the last Harpagornis! Noooo!"

It's not called "300" because of the number of Spartans...it's called "300" because that's the number of stars a rational person gives it. - Doug TenNapel
Top
Gloria
Posted: May 27, 04:37:01 PM


Meanwhile, the squirrels are plotting...
*

Group: Admin
Posts: 1,937
Member No.: 5
Joined: Nov 22, 2003



NEWS! .... I've done an edit on the 2nd U! story. I'll run it by Devon for his input and hopefully post it soon.

About now I'm really wishing I'd bothered to write these things better in the first place. *rolls eyes*


--------------------
"IRC is just multiplayer notepad."

"You ate the last Harpagornis! Noooo!"

It's not called "300" because of the number of Spartans...it's called "300" because that's the number of stars a rational person gives it. - Doug TenNapel
Top
Gloria
Posted: May 31, 12:23:39 PM


Meanwhile, the squirrels are plotting...
*

Group: Admin
Posts: 1,937
Member No.: 5
Joined: Nov 22, 2003



Aaaaand it's up!

This one's shorter than the last one and rather sad. Hope you like it.

http://untitled.comicgenesis.com/ustories.html



--------------------
"IRC is just multiplayer notepad."

"You ate the last Harpagornis! Noooo!"

It's not called "300" because of the number of Spartans...it's called "300" because that's the number of stars a rational person gives it. - Doug TenNapel
Top
Cameron
Posted: Jun 2, 01:16:07 PM


mini-muffin
*

Group: Members
Posts: 8
Member No.: 245
Joined: May 01, 2008



Wow, I'm amazed no one's commented on this yet. But then, I suppose there isn't much to say about this particular story, except "well, that's sad..." twapsad.gif
Top
Gloria
Posted: Jun 2, 01:48:01 PM


Meanwhile, the squirrels are plotting...
*

Group: Admin
Posts: 1,937
Member No.: 5
Joined: Nov 22, 2003



It's true! ;__;


Maybe the next one will inspire more discussion, because it is freaking INSANE. Seriously. I don't even know what to do with it it's so off-the-wall. 0_o





--------------------
"IRC is just multiplayer notepad."

"You ate the last Harpagornis! Noooo!"

It's not called "300" because of the number of Spartans...it's called "300" because that's the number of stars a rational person gives it. - Doug TenNapel
Top
Specter
Posted: Jun 2, 08:47:59 PM


Twapa clone
*

Group: Members
Posts: 66
Member No.: 144
Joined: Mar 13, 2006



Just downloaded it a minute ago. I'm not browsing much since I got downgraded to Dial-up.

[review pending]

EDIT:
[review compiled]

...

Congratulations, you actually made me teary. Which is not easy to do!

The most effective part of it was that it was presented in a very realistic and actual manner. The feelings described nail, precisely, how one feels in such situations.
Although, that my be because it described almost exactly (down to the car trip scenery) how a visit to my great-grandmother happens, except with a lot more Alzheimer’s.
In all, a very effective short where briefness, is many times surpassed and complemented by impact.

looking forward to more.


This post has been edited by Specter on Jun 2, 10:27:21 PM


--------------------
"I just put 1.795372 and 2.204628 together."
"And what does that mean?"
"Four!"


->DA gallery<-
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ottermike
Posted: Jun 3, 07:49:43 PM


Apollo's Girlfriend
*

Group: Members
Posts: 164
Member No.: 168
Joined: Mar 17, 2007



I can't do sad right now...I'll wait for the zany....


--------------------
Turkey City Lexicon
Stay With Me
blissfully ignorant of lolspeak
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Gloria
Posted: Jun 3, 09:52:49 PM


Meanwhile, the squirrels are plotting...
*

Group: Admin
Posts: 1,937
Member No.: 5
Joined: Nov 22, 2003



QUOTE (Specter @ Jun 2, 07:47:59 PM)
Just downloaded it a minute ago. I'm not browsing much since I got downgraded to Dial-up.

[review pending]

EDIT:
[review compiled]

...

Congratulations, you actually made me teary. Which is not easy to do!

The most effective part of it was that it was presented in a very realistic and actual manner.  The feelings described nail, precisely, how one feels in such situations.
Although, that my be because it described almost exactly (down to the car trip scenery) how a visit to my great-grandmother happens, except with a lot more Alzheimer’s.
In all, a very effective short where briefness, is many times surpassed and complemented by impact.

looking forward to more.

Thanks for the review, man! I actually do appreciate hearing what people think of these... it helps me gauge how well I'm doing. twapsmile.gif

I always try to go for realism in my writing... Because if I don't stop and THINK about what I'm writing (e.g., What sort of everyday stuff is going on in the background? What are the logical steps to the task a character needs to do? How do people usually act in these circumstances?) then I usually end up writing stuff that's so vague and generic that it's not even interesting. Sometimes that happens anyway, but looking at it from a realistic perspective helps a bit.

Writing U! stories is kind of easy because I'm working from the notion that the readers should already know at least what the characters look like, which saves me having to write lots of ugly, awkward descriptions. I think I am really terrible at descriptions. : p


--------------------
"IRC is just multiplayer notepad."

"You ate the last Harpagornis! Noooo!"

It's not called "300" because of the number of Spartans...it's called "300" because that's the number of stars a rational person gives it. - Doug TenNapel
Top
Gloria
Posted: Jul 31, 11:07:28 AM


Meanwhile, the squirrels are plotting...
*

Group: Admin
Posts: 1,937
Member No.: 5
Joined: Nov 22, 2003



New story is up!



--------------------
"IRC is just multiplayer notepad."

"You ate the last Harpagornis! Noooo!"

It's not called "300" because of the number of Spartans...it's called "300" because that's the number of stars a rational person gives it. - Doug TenNapel
Top
azichri
Posted: Jul 31, 05:11:20 PM


Twapa clone
*

Group: Members
Posts: 58
Member No.: 126
Joined: May 24, 2005



Wow, and quite the length, too! Thanks for another interesting read.
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