Chuck Norris?, He's Amazing!

[Aidinthel]

Chuck Norris is suing Myspace for taking the name of what he calls everything around you.

Outer space exists because it's afraid to be on the same planet with Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are trademarked names for his left and right legs.

Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.

Chuck Norris doesn’t wear a watch, HE decides what time it is.

There are no races, only countries of people Chuck Norris has beaten to different shades of black and blue.

Chuck Norris’ house has no doors, only walls that he walks through.

[Jae]

For undercover police work, Chuck Norris pins his badge underneath his shirt, directly into his chest.

Archaeologists unearthed an Old English dictionary dating back to the year 1236. It defined "Victim" as "One who has encountered Chuck Norris".

Chuck Norris CAN touch MC Hammer.

Chuck Norris doesn't actually write books, the words assemble themselves out of fear.

Chuck Norris once ate a whole cake before his friends could tell him there was a stripper in it.

Little known medical fact: Chuck Norris invented the Caesarean section when he roundhouse-kicked his way out of his mother's womb.

Chuck Norris uses Tabasco Sauce for eye drops.

The quickest way into a man's heart is Chuck Norris' fist.

[Wrathfull]

Very known medical fact: Chuck Norris invented the saying "I am your Judge, Jury, and Executioner" when he roundhouse kicked a raging patient into a wall.

Chuck Norris invented TV. Walker, Texas Ranger was made out of fear of Chuck Norris' fist.

Chuck Norris didn't beat Bruce Lee. Bruce Lee beat himself out of fear of Chuck Norris'.

Chuck Norris is the REAL best paladin in the world. ((But he is SO not the Lord of Darkness stealing my Mistress person))

Bill Gates and all those other weirdos invented the Internet Explorer out of fear of Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris does not age, age fears Chuck Norris

(((Yeah seriously no way is he better than the Lord. The Lord pwns him. Too many niceness stuffs to give it up, meheheheh.))

[Aidinthel]

Apple pays Chuck Norris 99 cents every time he listens to a song.

Chuck Norris once skewered a man with the Eiffel tower.

There are now five cup sizes at Starbucks: Short, Tall, Grande, Venti, and Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris' pulse is measured on the richter scale.

In ancient China there is a legend that one day a child will be born from a dragon, grow to be a man, and vanquish evil from the land. Chuck Norris killed that man.

Chuck Norris had to stop washing his clothes in the ocean. The tsunamis were killing people.

Chuck Norris knows the last digit of pi.

[Wrathfull]

Chuck Norris does not do his taxes. His taxes do themselves.

Chuck Norris' computer does not get viruses. Viruses fear Chuck Norris.

[NVM]

I get the feeling some of these are totally being made up on the spot. o.O

[Wrathfull]

Chuck Norris is the one who made Luna say that ^_~

[NVM]

Don't be silly.

Chuck Norris is a noob who knows better than to get too close to me let alone make me do anything.

[Wrathfull]

Uh huh, suuuure Luna, let's go with your theory.

[NVM]

Pffft!

I wouldn't like and/or listen to Chuck Norris EVEN IF all the silly facts about him were true.

Cuz I'm totally the queen of stubborn and Chuck Norris will never be cool in my opinion.

[Wrathfull]

You see Luna dear, Chuck Norris is all invisible and creeps up on you in the midst of the night.

He eats silly people, he also eats stubborn, and ignorant, and Queen type peoples.

Yes. This does count Blood Elf Priests.

[NVM]

Pffffffft!!!!!

Let him try!

[Wrathfull]

He doesn't need to try to own you!

I do though *scared*