Title: Under the Eye
Description: Ginny + Alexander
Marcus Aurelius - August 3, 2010 09:46 PM (GMT)
"You've got to think very carefully, boy," the Ancient glowered at his great-grand fledgling, "You've got to remember that you're not human. Not anymore. Your fate is not tied to theirs."
Alexander Cross stood facing him, his eyes clear and the familiar shakiness of fear even more so in his voice and demeanor. Marcus did not even have to Sense it to feel how polite the youth knew he must be. However, the words that came were spoken with conviction and sincere apologies.
"M'sorry, sir. I just can't give up on that part of me. I can understand, now, why you have...Lord knows you...I can feel how long you've been around. It's just that I've come to understand somethin' about myself; I'd rather die as a vampire tryin' to live as a human than the other way around." Alexander even gave a deep bow, as if that would help matters, "But I don't mean any sorta disrespect t'you."
Marcus narrowed his eyes sharply, "Your wishes will be respected then. I trust you will not regret them." He raised his chin, his brow furrowing as he Sensed another of his brood. "Your sire may persuade you otherwise, in time. As a sign of my good will, I will extend my offer to you for a month. Consider things more carefully," he warned.
The two males stood, one swallowed in the shadow of the other, but standing firm in the roots he had grown for himself. "G-ginny?" Alexander asked, beginning to sniff the air instinctively, looking about for some sign of the blonde vampiress that had turned his world on its head in more ways than one.
Genevieve - August 3, 2010 10:23 PM (GMT)
France was nice. Interesting, but nice. She was just glad to be home. And by herself. For the past month at least they'd been in the constant presence of one another, and while that wasn't necessarily a bad
thing - in fact it was a very, very good
ting -, Ginny was quite certain Marcel wanted a little break from her just as much as she did from him. He probably went off to see Sofia. Ginny, on the other hand, was much more content meandering by herself. It's not that she didn't want to see the other woman, she just didn't want to see her tonight
. Right now it was 'Ginny time'.
So she got dolled up - which was nothing more than curling her hair ever so slightly - and threw on a dress
and she was gone. A growing number of things in her wardrobe seemed to possess bows lately. It was probably just a minor, passing fetish, but Ginny still rather liked it.
She didn't know exactly where she was going, she just knew that she wanted to see something different. Something unique to London itself. That led her to none other than the Eye. It's not like she'd never seen it before, but once she arrived, she suspected her feet led her there more because of who
was there rather than what.
The presence of two men, one of which she was a bit more than acquainted with and the other of which she was quite
a bit more than acquainted with, graced the area. And how could she not be curious? And excited. And astounded. Not so much by the fact that Marcus was here, but by the fact that Alex was here. She tried to keep her excitement level, but her curiosity was off the charts.
They were talking about something. For a moment she just stood there, concealed in the shadows, and she watched. But then Marcus mentioned her and a tiny smile snuck on her face. But what were they talking about? Some...offer. Something. Just as Alex spoke her name, Ginny strode out of the shadows, her skin practically abuzz. She probably should have acknowledged Marcus immediately, but all she could do was walk up to her fledgeling with a growing smile, throw her arms around his neck and press her lips to his cheek before pressing her face into his throat. "I thought I'd never see you again,"
she murmured, lingering affection still ridden in her voice.
Alexander Cross - August 3, 2010 10:42 PM (GMT)
Alex didn't have time to process what was happening before it had already happened. Ginny strode out of the shadows and before he could so much as greet her, she'd wrapped her arms around his neck and placed a kiss to his cheek, nuzzling at him as if he were her long-lost brother. Instinct guided his arms to wrap around her, more than his will did.
"Well, if I knew you would bring her around, I'd have liked to see you a year or two ag--" Alexander looked up to see that Marcus had vanished completely, "--o..." he finished his sentence, looking perplexed.
He had Ginny in his arms. Out of no where. He was glad, he thought. She always felt good in his arms...but two years didn't mean he'd forgotten. That would be impossible. He couldn't forget how he'd felt for her any more than he could forget the ache of missing the sunlight or how he missed his mother's country-fried steak.
That didn't stop him from hugging her so tightly it would have hurt a mortal woman. Ginny wasn't human, though...and for the first time, he didn't treat her as if she were. "You didn't?" he chuckled into her ear, "Should know better than that, honey." He smiled at her with that good-natured grin of his and pulled her close to kiss her square on the lips. Not necessarily passionately, or romantically, even...but a stark reminder that he'd simply never see her as 'just blood-family'. It was short and filled with the excitement in his own voice, however mixed his deeper emotions were...one thing was for certain. "Your face sure is a sight for sore eyes."
Genevieve - August 3, 2010 11:03 PM (GMT)
Deep in the back of her mind, Ginny thought there was a chance Alex might push her away. But she didn't care. She hugged him anyway. And she kissed his cheek and she just held onto him. She was terribly happy to see him in the ache from missing him resonated deep in her chest. She did think about him often. She'd never forgotten about him. Although she did spend the first six months or so after he left for the States trying to convince herself that she hated every fiber of his being, she came to realize that couldn't have been farther from the truth.
But now he was here! And this was real. She was quite sure she would have never seen him again. Well, never was a long time, but they had long lives. Alex was talking, but she almost didn't hear him. And it's not like he was talking to her anyway. Right, Marcus. But suddenly, just as if Ginny's ignoring him made him not exist, Marcus had disappeared. The lack of his presence was a slight relief, though.
"You didn't? Should know better than that, honey."
Ginny's cheeks reddened and she hugged him a bit more tightly, reflecting the manner that his arms held her. Honey. Marcel never called her that. Well, then again, Marcel was nothing like Alex. He had his pet names for her, of course, and Ginny did adore them, but Alex was an American man. He had different words. They were nice to hear.
She was too surprised to stop him before he pressed a sort of chaste kiss onto her lips. To anyone on the outside, it looked like nothing. But Ginny could feel every single thing behind the brief meeting of lips. And you know what? She didn't feel too terribly guilty about...not feeling guilty. It was nothing. Just a friendly gesture between friends. Yes.
"Your face sure is a sight for sore eyes."
She pulled back to cup his face for a moment before taking a little step back, no longer holding him. They couldn't...stand there like that. Marcel would already be suspicious enough about her lips. "I could say the same," she said, just staring at him for a moment with a little smile before twisting and looking around, her expression confused. "Huh," she mumbled. "Marcus never has been one for emotional encounters," she mused, looking back to meet his eyes. "What were you two talking about anyway? How have you been?"
Alexander Cross - August 4, 2010 12:14 AM (GMT)
Ginny didn't seem to be all that aware Marcus was there at all. He couldn't much tell when the older vampire had actually vanished, but it was fast enough for him to wonder at it for a few seconds, reluctant to be impressed with such a smooth exit. Ginny pulling away was enough to recall him to what was going on.
He grinned at her, "Didn't strike me as such," he agreed with her comment about the Ancient, putting his hands into his pockets as she asked about what they'd been talking about.
"Seems he's goin' about collectin' his family. Seein' if they're gonna stick with him." He gave her a shrug, "If I have t'choose between livin' with vampires an' livin' with humans ---" his voice trailed off, shaking his head, "Well, you know me."
He extended a hand to her, "C'mon. We've got a lot to catch up on an' this big ol' Ferris Wheel seems like the best sort'a setting for it." If she accepted, he'd lead her to the London Eye and insist that he pay for two tickets for entry. Alexander Cross was the same man he'd always been...but that did not mean there was no change. He simply did not seem interested in making apologies for anything. He'd kissed her without hesitation or any hint of a second thought. He reached to hold her hand, not because he was trying to romance her or lead her away from the male she still smelled of, but because he simply wanted to feel her hand, again. It had been too long and he wasn't going to tiptoe around things just to be polite. It was innocent enough. For all the world knew, they were close friends, siblings, heck...he could even have been her gay friend. None of those things were true in entirety...especially the last one; but it didn't matter. After all, he didn't have anybody to go home to or be suspicious of what he did. All he had was the moment and his own desire to do what he wanted to do; and right now, all he wanted was to spend time with Ginny.
Genevieve - August 4, 2010 02:47 AM (GMT)
"Seems he's goin' about collectin' his family. Seein' if they're gonna stick with him. If I have t'choose between livin' with vampires an' livin' with humans --- Well, you know me."
Ginny frowned, obviously in concern. Well...that wasn't what she wanted to hear, really. Ginny...she'd accepted Marcus' offer within days of its proposal. But Alex...didn't want it? He didn't want to be a part of whatever it was that Marcus was putting together? True, it might have been smart to figure out exactly what Marcus was planning before accepting, but...she didn't want to be shunned from her family. And if she was taken under Marus' wing, then that meant there was the possibility of getting him to take in others that she cared about. Honestly, the thought of Alex opting out disturbed her terribly.
She didn't say anything yet though. Maybe she'd bring it up later, but for now, Alex extended his hand to her. She didn't even have to give it a second thought; she reached out and took it, her fingers slipping easily through his. Marcel didn't like holding hands. He'd much rather have her around the waist. Not that she minded, of course, but Ginny liked holding hands. She could almost remember when the hand she held now was warm and alive.
"C'mon. We've got a lot to catch up on an' this big ol' Ferris Wheel seems like the best sort'a setting for it."
Ginny looked up at the giant contraption. She'd never been on it before - never really had the interest. But it couldn't hurt. Plus, Marcel was spending time with people dear to him - no reason why she couldn't spend time with probably the only other person besides her lover that was dear to her.
She followed contently and Alex bought them tickets. If he had expected her to pay, well...she wouldn't have been able to go. It wasn't often that she kept money on her person. She didn't have a lot. Marcel had some now that he took up that job. But he paid and the man led them to settle them into a cab before setting the thing in motion. Ginny took a seat, her hand slipping out of his. She wasn't entirely sure whether she should sit across him or beside him...so she took her seat first so he had to make that choice. When they were settled, she leaned back and crossed her legs at the knees. "So..." she said quietly, looking at the ground for a moment before her eyes rose to meet his. She cocked her head to the side curiously. "Where have you been?"
Alexander Cross - August 4, 2010 11:45 AM (GMT)
Once they were inside the little cabin, Alexander shut the door and sat on the cushioned bench opposite his former fiance without blinking an eye. He was sort of proud of Ginny for being able to keep in a relationship for so long. Though, the nagging reminder of what he knew of her and her own sire made him suspicious as to the whether or not her lasting relationships were all that healthy. Things he didn't feel the need to speak aloud. Instead, he let his sincere feelings of happiness at seeing her do all the speaking for him.
"Line Springs, Tennessee for starters," Alex began. "Ma and Dad were a lot more accepting than I'd imagined. I forgot how much I missed home." His fingers found their way to his curly, golden hair which he twirled about them idly, looking past Ginny in warm memory, "Felt good to go home." His eyes flicked back to her face and scratched his head for a moment before dropping his hands to his lap, as he crossed his legs, resting his right ankle upon his opposite knee.
"Had a hard time about three months in, there. Vampire stuff, y'know. Had trouble with the need for...blood," it was apparent he was uncomfortable admitting and talking about such things, but he smiled through it. "So I decided to put myself to good use, an' joined up in the military. May not be in uniform, but I'm still an active member."
He paused a moment and gave her the sort of salute he would have been berated for in bootcamp, "Sergeant Alexander Cross of the U.S. Army Rangers," the formality and gravity in his title and voice were offset by his sly grin.
Genevieve - August 5, 2010 03:20 AM (GMT)
It had been two years. They did have a lot of catching up to do...and Ginny wanted to know everything. Literally, everything. She had always been a nosy woman, and that hadn't changed over the years - but the fact that they'd been so close before increased her desire to know. More specifically, she wanted to know if he was involved with another woman. She didn't know whether or not she expected it; but seeing as how he didn't smell like anyone but himself and he kissed her that way...Ginny had to assume there was no one in his life except for...well, himself.
For some reason, Ginny felt a tiny weight lift from her shoulders. Okay, even thought she didn't have the right to be, she was a bit jealous at even the idea of him engaging in anything other than an exchanging of glances with another woman. Even thinking about it now caused her chest to tighten ever so slightly.
Either way, they were both now in the cab and Ginny had asked him a simple question. Where had he been? He told her without any sort of hesitation. He didn't even have to think. He talked about Tennessee and his parents. She smiled; good, they were still on good terms. She was slightly afraid he'd go home just to be shunned. It was good to know he had people. Family.
He began playing with his hair in an all too endearing way that Ginny couldn't help but notice. It caused her mouth to twitch up a bit more at the corners.
He talked about blood and...wait...the military? Ginny's brow furrowed, but more in curiosity than indignation.
"May not be in uniform, but I'm still an active member. Sergeant Alexander Cross of the U.S. Army Rangers."
He was obviously proud of himself, and Ginny had a feeling she should be proud of him too...but...he could get hurt! The worry resonated deeply in her eyes. Hell, just because she didn't go back with him two years ago and hadn't seen him for those two years did, by no means, mean that she didn't care for his well being. "That's...great, but...you're not going to get hurt, are you?" She chewed on the inside of her mouth for a moment, folding her hands around her knees. "I don't want anything to happen to you..." It was probably silly to think such things, but bullets weren't the only weapons in war. A bomb could easily kill him. The thought was terrifying. Ginny'd never had one of her fledglings die...she only had two, of course, but she didn't want Alex to die. Or get hurt. Or anything.
Alexander Cross - August 5, 2010 10:26 PM (GMT)
He wasn't expecting Ginny's reaction. Her words caused his eyebrows to raise and his blue eyes to widen slightly, "Happen to me?" he echoed questioningly. The irony of her concern was enough to make him chuckle. "Plently've that already has, Gin. So much, in fact, that when I was back home I had a hard time even lookin' at myself in the mirror. The very nature of what I have to do, what I want to do to get a meal...it scares me."
He sighed, resting both of his feet flat on the ground, letting his elbows sit upon his knees. "It's better now. Now that I've seen enough violence to last a lifetime...makes me remember what it should feel like, takin' somebody else's son off the face of this earth. Reminds me that no matter how hungry I get for it, there's only one place I'll ever go to find it."
Alexander looked at Genevieve with clear, unclouded eyes. When faced with the bloodlust every vampire faces, he had responded in the only way he could and still hold on to his humanity. He still valued human life above all, even if he wasn't one of them anymore. "If I wanna kill, it's only fair I put my head out there, too." It made sense to him and the only way he could begin to justify it was to make sure it was terrorists and the like that met the other end of his fangs.
Genevieve - August 5, 2010 11:10 PM (GMT)
Alexander seemed almost surprised that the words had come out of her mouth...and she wasn't entirely sure whether she should just let it go or get huffy about it. Then again, she lost the right to be huffy two years ago. Still didn't mean it didn't cross her mind. Besides, this was going well so far. She didn't want to screw it up and end up pushing him away again.
"Plenty've that already has, Gin. So much, in fact, that when I was back home, I had a hard time even lookin' at myself in the mirror."
Ginny frowned. She'd never been in war. She'd never witnessed it. Sure, over the centuries, wars were waged all around her, but she was securely locked away in her little castle. So she didn't have to worry about it.
He repositioned himself, but Ginny had barely moved. She was almost like a statue. She didn't even really blink. She just watched him, not entirely sure what to make of what he was telling her.
"If I wanna kill, it's only fair I put my head out there, too."
His perspective was skewed. Or...was it her own that was skewed? "I don't like it," she mumbled, crossing her arms and looking down at her knees for a moment. "You don't have to do it like that. Why don't you get your blood from a blood bank? There are several around here that have been started specifically for us..." Not that Ginny had been to any of these herself. She didn't trust it. She'd rather take directly from the human.
Alexander Cross - August 6, 2010 10:51 AM (GMT)
If he were the jaded sort of ex-fiance, he would gladly remind her that it did not matter what she thought about his chosen profession. Alexander, thankfully, was not that sort of man. In fact, from where he was sitting, it felt pretty good to know that Ginny still cared about him. At least, whether he lived or died. It was cute, actually...her huffy behavior was sort of endearing. He couldn't help but smirk at her knowingly.
"I do, when I'm off duty," he said. "But we both know an easy meal isn't what really fills us up all the time, though, is it?" His voice was slightly more grave and his expression grim. It wasn't always just the blood that he hungered for. He knew why Ginny murdered innocent civilians...he just wasn't going to do the same thing.
"That's not to say I've gone an' given up on Vivan, though," Alex switched topics rather harshly, sitting with his back against the car's backrest again. There was nothing more to talk about. He wasn't going to give up being a Ranger or serving and protecting his country, nor was he going to continue to beat a dead horse and just get the both of them all worked up and unhappy. He wanted to keep things happy. "I wrote a few real gems when I was back home and two more just recently," he mentioned casually as he looked out over the city from a bird's eye view. "Wouldn't mind a captive audience, some time."
Genevieve - August 6, 2010 04:09 PM (GMT)
Ginny never was one for keeping her opinions to herself, so she just let it out. She told him what she thought, even if she didn't have the right to think it at all. Sure, they weren't together anymore, but he was still her fledgling. She gave him an alternative. He could just get his blood from a bank. Alex was so much like a human that she hadn't even expected what came out of his mouth next.
"I do, when I'm off duty. But we both know an easy meal isn't what really fills us up all the time, though, is it?"
Her eyes actually widened a bit in surprise. No, she wasn't expecting that at all. Not from him. Alex actually wanted to kill people? That was a terribly odd and hard to believe concept. Her Alex didn't like killing people. Her Alex hardly liked asking for blood. But things changed, obviously.
"That's not to say I've gone an' given up on Vivian, though."
The sudden change in topic startled her, but she let it go. Fine, if he didn't want to talk about his choices, then she wouldn't press him about it. She still held steadfast to her opinion, although she had absolutely no idea how she would ever talk him out of it.
"I wrote a few real gems when I was back home and two more just recently. Wouldn't mind a captive audience, some time."
Her brow rose in interest and she smiled, relaxing a bit and loosening her arms from around herself. She could remember when he wrote songs just for her, and he wouldn't let her listen to them until they were absolutely perfect. Ginny was vain enough to wonder if any of the songs he'd written recently were about her, but she wasn't vain enough to actually ask.
"I'd love to hear them," she said, offering a grin. Her eyes shifted to where he was looking. They were up terribly high, now, but she guessed it was a good thing she wasn't afraid of heights. It probably wasn't smart to ask, but..."Maybe after this, we could go back to your place and you can play them for me...where are you staying, anyway?"
Alexander Cross - August 8, 2010 03:49 PM (GMT)
The way Ginny's arms wrapped around her like a safety blanket had always been a curious thing to Alexander. She always did it when she was scared, frustrated, unhappy...negative things. Wrapping her arms around her was never a positive posture. He could've fixed it by telling her he would stop what he was doing. She was trying to suggest he quit the military. Such a thing hurt his pride, not his ego, but his natural-born pride as a man and an American. He couldn't do that and he did not want to. So, he changed the subject.
Ginny eased up after he did and even mentioned she'd like to come over and hear his songs. "I've got a steady income, now. Enough to get a place over on Chelsea Manor Street. If we take a cab, won't take much longer than fifteen minutes are so t'get there...but," he blinked at her, "We've still got a way to go before we're on the ground, again...why don't you pass the time tellin' me how you've been."
As much as she wanted to know how he was, as much concern as she had for him, he mirrored back. Alexander seemed comfortable with seeing her, but underneath his skin a muddled feeling of mixed emotions churned. Bittersweetness left him with nothing but longing either to make things right or find a way to be free from being shackled to the past.
Genevieve - August 8, 2010 06:24 PM (GMT)
When she was with Alex before, he couldn't afford his own place here. She almost expected him to be staying in a hotel again, like last time, but it would seem that wasn't the case at all. He bought himself a place. Here. Ginny smiled. Good! So that meant he was meaning to stay. He wasn't going to leave again...maybe. That meant this didn't have to be the last night she saw him...at least unless he wanted it to be.
"We've still got a way to go before we're on the ground, again...why don't you pass the time tellin' me how you've been."
Ginny seemed startled by his suggestion - not really the suggestion in and of itself, but what she wanted to answer. How had she been? When she was alone, she was good. She could concentrate on things she liked, like drawing, without getting yelled at about it. "I'm fine." The answer was spoken much too quickly and much too short to be believable. She didn't want to talk about how she was doing. Her gaze flickered down to her knees for a moment and her arms hugged herself a bit more tightly, trying to figure out what she should say. "I...Well, we...we got home from Iceland and France quite a while ago. It was beautiful...if you ever get a chance to go to Iceland, you should go..." She went quiet and only looked at him ever so briefly again before settling her eyes on her feet, then out the glass, overlooking the city.
"No, but really. Everything's...everything's perfect...I'm good. Things are good. Things are fine. Some days are better than others," her voice got quieter and somehow, she kept a smile. It wasn't terribly sincere, but it was the best she could do. Alex didn't need to know how she really was. He didn't need to know that the man she chose over him was abusive. That wouldn't make her just feel like a fool, then. She'd look like a fool too. Plus, it's not like he meant it...Marcel apologized. Every time, he apologized.
Eventually, she raised her head to look at him again, giving him a warmer smile, looking around herself before standing up and going towards the glass. She was getting antsy thinking about everything. She needed to move. "This is amazing. I've never been on this before. Never thought it would be such a big deal." Her subject change wasn't anywhere near as abrupt as his. "What are you doing while you're in London?" She asked, deflecting the talk back onto him, but she didn't look back at him. She just looked out over the city.
Alexander Cross - August 8, 2010 11:57 PM (GMT)
Ginny's answer wasn't conveyed in words, but her actions and tone told him all he needed to know. Something was not right between she and her...man. Something was causing her to wrap her arms around herself like that, to force a smile that clearly did not come naturally onto her pretty face. The face he'd woken up next to. The face he'd seen in sorrow and ecstasy...and yet had still managed to turn the other way as he made a move to leave what love they had. Nothing worked out the way he'd hoped that night, his good intentions shattered like the fragile glass figurine they were.
"Oh," he replied quietly. Though he wished to catch her glance and give her the knowing look that would somehow convey his desire to 'be there' for her. She'd turned away, though, looking outside the car's window and over the skyline. He didn't pursue it, there would be time later to let her know. Instead, he turned his head and hummed his agreement. Seeing her force herself to give him a smile was, in a word, depressing.
"The most important things never are a big deal," he said rather cryptically. A wistful tone in his voice, "We forget 'em." Almost as if he were scolding himself, Alex sighed and let his head lean forward to rest on the window as he answered her, "Waitin' for something," he said simply, "Just waitin' for either my next tour or a reason not to go back."
Genevieve - August 9, 2010 12:44 AM (GMT)
Ginny wasn't entirely sure how convincing her answer was. In fact, she was pretty sure Alex knew she was lying, but if he did, he didn't bring it up. He just gave a quiet "Oh". Ginny didn't like to lie to him - in fact, it was very hard for her to lie to anybody. She just...didn't want to put her problems on him. Especially relationship problems. She didn't want him to get upset. She could deal with this herself. And who knew, maybe it was just a little rough patch. For all she knew, Marcel could just...wake up one day and be normal. She liked living with this little fantasy. It was helping her get by.
But she had nothing else to say and Alex didn't ask anything else...or she didn't really give him a chance to. She just commented on the Eye and the city and her lack of experience with it.
"The most important things never are a big deal. We forget 'em."
She glanced back at him for a moment, but not long enough to keep any sort of eye contact. She didn't know whether he was talking about this ride or something else that had to do with there rocky past. She could have read too much into it, but she thought it might have been the latter. Then again, that could have also been Ginny thinking everything revolved around her. Or something like that.
"Waitin' for something. Just waitin' for either my next tour or a reason not to go back."
She turned around and leaned against the glass. Her brow furrowed curiously as she looked at him, thoughts of Marcel being pushed to the back of her mind. Waiting for something. What? "What kind of reason?" A tiny twinge of hope leaked into her voice. Was he looking for a job opportunity? Ginny could get him a job here. Sebastian, she was sure, could use him somehow. And if not Sebastian...then...maybe Jack could use help with his firm. Something.
Alexander Cross - August 22, 2010 03:36 AM (GMT)
"Ahh," he avoided a direct answer the way a toddler would attempt to hide a broken vase behind their back so their parent couldn't see, "Dunno. Just waitin' to see what might be around the corner," he half-lied.
Alexander wasn't normally one for lying, but he could just imagine the stink Ginny would put up if she knew he'd read about a cure for the vampire condition being developed in London, one he'd already signed up for being considered a test subject for. Tactless though it was, he smiled at her broadly, "Well, 'cause you never know, y'know?"
For the remainder of the ride, he would do his best to simply smile off any probing glances she sent him and dodging questions with all the grace of a drunken walrus, banking on the fact that since he wasn't her intended anymore, she wouldn't ask too much. He was a terrible liar and all he really wanted to do was spend time with her...not open a can of worms that was better left shut.
If successfully making it out of the Eye without to many holes burned into his skull, Alexander would happily remind Ginny that Vivian was waiting back in his apartment for them, a hopeful smile still plastered on his face.
Genevieve - August 22, 2010 05:17 PM (GMT)
"Ahh, dunno. Just waitin' to see what might be around the corner."
Ginny stared at him a moment more, suspicion rising ever so briefly in her eyes. One of Alexander's most charming faults was that he couldn't hide behind his face. Whatever he felt seemed to surface almost immediately, and Ginny loved that about him. Yes, loved. She still loved him in her own little way that wasn't too different from the love she had for him before. This love was just quieter; more reserved.
And she knew him well enough to know that he wasn't telling her something. It made Ginny slightly uncomfortable, but she didn't really have the right to prod, did she? So because she couldn't ask questions, she could only assume. Was he trying to find someone else to love? The thought certainly caused unwarranted flames of jealousy to erupt in her chest. In a perfect world, those feelings wouldn't have been there. Then again, in a perfect world, Ginny wouldn't have massacred their relationship in the first place.
She didn't really say anything after that. She didn't even take her seat again. She just sort of stood there looking out the glass and catching Alex's gaze in the reflection every now and then. Eventually the ride came to an end and they filed out back onto the sidewalk where they were before. She'd almost forgotten about her suggestion, at least until Alex reminded her. Well...that brightened her up just a bit. If he was going to take her back to his apartment, then certainly he wouldn't have somebody waiting for him. He wouldn't do that. It was cruel. Alex wasn't a cruel man. It would be like her taking him home to meet Marcel...although she wouldn't even take people who were no more than friends to meet the man. She was too ashamed. Instead, she could just talk about him in the way that she'd like him to be. Or the way that he used to be.
Ginny slipped her hand into his again and waited for him to lead the way. She thought that she might want to keep her hands to herself, but she figured Marcel would be too drunk tonight to even notice the smell of another man on her. On the other hand, she sort of hoped he would notice.
All of those thoughts aside, Ginny smiled a bit more brightly at Alex as they walked, opting for silence for about half the way before she spoke her thoughts. "What are your new songs about?" She asked, curiosity laden in her voice. Really, what she meant to ask was "Are any of your new songs about me?" but that sounded a bit too narcissistic...
Alexander Cross - September 2, 2010 11:56 AM (GMT)
Alex was grateful Ginny didn't press any topics. He was a terrible liar and an even worse one when it came to her. He smiled broadly when she stepped out onto the pavement and wove her hand into his and wasted no time getting to the street to hail a cab. "Some of 'em are about me. Some of 'em are about my family," he raised his free hand for the purpose of snagging a taxi throwing a sidelong glance at her before facing towards the street again, "An' some of 'em are about you."
The car pulled up to the sidewalk and he ushered her inside first before slipping in, himself. "Chelsea Manor Street," he directed.
He made conversation during the ride, as if he hadn't left a comment about writing songs for her hanging open. She asked and he answered, there was little else to say about it. The apartment wasn't very far, just a few minutes, his 'war story' about a young recruit losing an awful bet and having to wear women's undergarments for a week, was finished as he opened the door and held out his hand to help her out. "I didn't envy him," Alexander shuddered as he reached over to pay cab fare. He turned around and pointed to the apartments
, "Home, sweet home," Alexander said in a sing-song tone.
Once they were up the stairs and inside, he slipped his shoes off and walked further in. The room was hardly decorated, a woman's touch being sadly missed, but it was clean and warm and comfortable. The kitchen still served its purpose, as the host never wanted to be without means to accomodate. The real draw to this visit sat in the corner, a familiar, old mandolin. Alexander gravitated towards it, "What are you in the mood for tonight?" he asked, since there wasn't a mood he was unable to convey on his instrument of choice.
Genevieve - September 2, 2010 06:34 PM (GMT)
"Some of 'em are about me. Some of 'em are about family. An' some of 'em are about you."
She bit her lip, trying to bite back a smile, which didn't completely work. But soon enough, it didn't matter. The taxi stopped and she slipped inside and Alex followed. She wanted to ask more, but before she could, he set off on a war story...well, it wasn't exactly about war, but it was a tiny chronicle in his time oversees. And actually, it was quite amusing. Men were so cruel to each other, weren't they? Well, it's not like they had anything else to do.
It only seemed like minutes later that the cab was coming to a stop. Home, sweet home. Home. That was good. He was calling this place home. That meant something, didn't it? Something long term. Or perhaps she was looking too far into it, but a girl could hope.
She followed him into the giant brick building, up the stairs, past all sorts of rooms until finally they found his own. The last time he invited her up to his room, romantic, passionate happenings went on. Even if this wasn't a hotel...it was close enough. She stepped in and the door closed behind her before she followed suit, slipping off her shoes. She felt just the tiniest bit awkward, but nothing that made her want to leave. She took her time looking around, not investigating with anything except her eyes.
"What are you in the mood for tonight?"
Her eyes snapped back on him and she ventured in a bit further. Only then did she catch sight of the instrument he was heading for. Her face brightened. Vivian. Funny how she could remember that even now. She used to tease him how she had her suspicions that he loved that thing more than he loved her...
She pushed that to the back of her mind as she moved to sit down on the couch, leaning forward slightly, her eyes glinting with curiosity. "Something soft, maybe sad...or happy. It doesn't matter...play one of the songs you wrote for me," she offered him a little, pleading grin. "Please?"
Alexander Cross - September 2, 2010 06:54 PM (GMT)
Even though he'd asked for her suggestion, Alexander already had a pretty good idea what he was going to play. More for his sake, than hers. It was a song he'd written before he was shipped out and as she sat waiting for him to begin, he plucked on Vivian's strings a few times to get her in tune.
"This is for you, then," he said softly. The song
he began to play started softly, with a distinct melancholy in each of the notes that rang through the air. The picking he did on the strings was a curious reminder of his mastery over the instrument. Each one was singular and yet, the note resonated in the air for some time before being replaced by another. He closed his eyes, as he always did when he was about to sing, and drew in a deep breath, "Tryin' on a brand new dress..." the song began, an obvious lamentation over the past and an earnest, distressed sense of regret followed.
It was slow, and sad...and about her. As the last note was left to linger in the air, he opened his eyes slowly, avoiding her at first. It would be hard to face her after he'd just laid his soul bare for her to see...the song outlined perfectly all of his remorse and his desire to be with her, though it was ambiguous as to in what way he wanted it. The song didn't offer any solid answers, it was open to interpretation...and whether life was imitating art, or the other way around, Alexander seemed unsure, himself. He didn't know who she was to him, anymore. All he really knew is that after all they had been through, he still wanted her in his life. Beyond that, he was at a loss for words.
Genevieve - September 2, 2010 08:00 PM (GMT)
Ginny wasn't entirely sure what to expect. She didn't know what he wrote about her. She didn't know whether it would be sad or happy or anything in between...okay, she sorta figured it might be a little sad. But she still wanted to hear it. Curiosity overwhelmed her and spilled out of her mouth in the form of a question. Could he play a song for her? He didn't have to if he didn't want to, but she really did want to hear it. Maybe it would make her feel better?
"This is for you, then."
She waited almost anxiously, folding her hands around her knees as she watched him as he began to pluck the strings. He closed his eyes, took a breath...and then he began to sing. The melody was pleasant enough, especially since it was his voice, but the words...they made her smile fall into a contemplative expression. She felt a tiny bit uncomfortable, but that was nothing new.
When it was finally finished, they both seemed to have an air of awkward uncertainness about them. Ginny wasn't sure what to think. She wasn't sure what to say? What was there to say? Everything she'd managed to bury over the past few years had managed to surface again, just because of some song. She looked down at her feet for a moment before looking at him, who in turn looked elsewhere, or at least not at her. "That was very pretty," she finally managed to say, although for a moment she thought it would have been best not to say anything at all.
She sat there a moment more before looking at him again. She was so confused. Confused about what to think, what to say, what to do. What did he want from her? She didn't know. He never did say. But something made her go towards him in his chair, get down on her knees and place her hands on his own knees so maybe he'd look at her. She tilted her head back and leaned forward a bit and pressed her lips against his. It was a slow sort of kiss, but it was deep too. And nothing like when she kissed Marcel anymore. At least lately. His kisses were hard and rough and reserved for when he wanted her to stop talking or when he didn't want to look at her while they "made love".
She pulled away after a few seconds, biting her lip and looking from his eyes to his lips. She stayed there only a moment more before she moved back to her seat on the couch, crossing her legs at the knee and leaning back, her hands folded on her stomach.
Alexander Cross - September 2, 2010 11:35 PM (GMT)
Genevieve was unfair. In what she did and the things she said. That had not changed about her. In a way, it was comforting to know she still saw him as someone who could never take advantage of a situation like this one. She'd kissed a man who wasn't hers and seemed to expect that would be the end of it. Maybe a few years back, that would have been the end of it. Maybe she would have kissed him and he would have bowed his head shyly and busied himself with cleaning his mandolin, or something else to distract him from what he wanted to do.
Things were different, now. Alexander learned that even a vampire's life can be ended in an instant. That tomorrow was promised to no one. Immortality meant little on the battlefield and that mentality was too fresh, too real in his mind for him to simply lie down and pretend he didn't feel anything for her. Ambiguous though it was, his song wasn't written for 'just a friend'. It had been written for Ginny, and Ginny was far from 'just' anybody.
His hands had gripped the mandolin tightly as she came nearer and tighter still when she pressed her lips to his. Everything was different while simultaneously feeling exactly the same. The thought of being with Ginny again like this was the thing he both wanted and feared the most. Fear, though, had dropped on the list he used to guide his actions. Fear had no place in his relationship with Ginny, whatever it might end up being. So, he kissed her back. It was anything but one-sided...and as she returned herself to the sofa, he kept his eyes fixed on hers.
Alexander didn't live to please others and he even though he didn't want to push her away, he had to tell her where he stood. From what he knew of her, she'd probably want to know what he wanted with her, from her...well, for once, he was going to lay it out plain and simple. He set Vivian on the ground, letting her rest on the side of the chair he'd been sitting in, and moved to sit next to Ginny. His hand took one of hers, holding it securely while the other touched her chin fondly.
"I don't want to be your brother, or your son, or your good friend. I don't want you to be my ex-girlfriend. I don't want any labels at all, except the ones that matter." His hand moved from her chin to rest his fingertips squarely in the middle of her collarbone, "You're Genevieve and I'm Alexander. That's all. You'll always have a place in my life that only you can fill an' it'll be there until the day I die...so," he took in her whole face, glancing at her lips for a lingering moment before looking up again to meet her gaze, "Wherever we go and whoever we're with, just know nobody will ever take your place."
A long time ago, he'd told her that she had ruined him for anyone else. In a lot of ways, that was still true. He might finally have room in his heart for someone else, but a Ginny-shaped hole would be there forever. It only took him two years putting his life on the line and coming to terms with who and what he was, but he was finally okay with that.
Genevieve - September 3, 2010 04:52 AM (GMT)
She wasn't really thinking about what she was doing. She didn't want to think about it, because she couldn't really explain how she felt. She loved Marcel. Despite everything and how he treated her, she really did love him. She loved Alex just the same, but he walked out on her. Not without reason, not at all, but he still left instead of working things out with her. Funny enough, though, she still trusted him. She didn't trust Marcel. Well, she trusted that she would never know what to expect from him. She trusted that he could be unpredictable. But now she just kissed her former fiance; a man she had no claim on, at least from his perspective - Ginny's view on the matter was different, though. Alex was her fledgling. He was hers in one way or another, whether he knew that or not.
The kiss was returned and she felt relief. Nothing but relief. She missed being kissed like this. Kisses that conveyed feelings that had absolutely nothing to do with lust or hormones. She actually had to force herself to pull away, though. And, as if it were nothing at all, she went back to her seat and sat there. She didn't look at him - she just stared at her hands, but she could feel his eyes burning into her. She wondered what he was thinking, what was going to happen next. She probably should have been feeling guilty right about now, and maybe she did, just a little bit. Not enough to make her want to take it back, though. Marcel wouldn't notice. He never noticed her. He'd be too drunk to even care. And if he did notice and he did care? Maybe he'd push her or scream or something. She could always hide in the spare room; it's not like she hadn't done it before.
After a moment, he moved to sit beside her. Her eyes shifted to his face as he took her hand and on her chin. Such tender, fond gestures were beyond her. Marcel never touched her like this. At the beginning of their relationship, he did. He could be very affectionate and even silly with his attentions, but now...she just didn't think about it. It was too depressing.
"I don't want to be your brother, or your son, or your good friend. I don't want you to be my ex-girlfriend. I don't want any labels at all, except the ones that matter."
She wasn't sure what that meant, but she couldn't find her voice to ask. What were they, then? What would they be? Something undetermined? Just a something? Like Sofia was her something...except now Sofia was her friend. Was this the process? Was this how things were supposed to work? Her breath caught ever so slightly when his fingers moved down to touch her collarbone.
"You're Genevieve and I'm Alexander. That's all. You'll always have a place in my life that only you can fill an' it'll be there until the day I die...so... Wherever we go and whoever we're with, just know nobody will ever take your place."
Ginny was surprisingly quiet. Not because she didn't have anything to say, she was just sort of...stricken. Alexander always had that ability to drive his words deep. After a moment, she took the hand on her chest and brought it up, pressing her face into his palm and closing her eyes. It was a fond, affectionate gesture, but it was also very, very sad. "Nobody will ever take your place either," she murmured. And it was true. Marcel hadn't replaced Alex, just like nobody would replace Marcel if it all came down to it. She kissed his palm and one of his fingers before she took his hand in her lap, her fingers following his to his knuckles, touching him almost curiously. She concentrated on his hand. "I probably shouldn't still love you, but I do." She was just conflicted. So conflicted.
Alexander Cross - September 15, 2010 11:11 AM (GMT)
Alexander drew in a deep, long breath. Breathing was a habit he still hadn't kicked. Two years after the fact and he still seemed as attached to it as he did to his skin. His head shook slightly, "Don't say that, Gin." Deep, blue eyes fixed to hers unwaveringly and he took on a resolute tone, as if he were defending his faith, his very way of life. He forced her gaze by moving the hand she'd been staring at to raise her chin gently. "How you feel, about me...or--or anybody, that's up to you. The only crime, Ginny, is pretending it isn't real or passin' it off like your feelings don't matter."
He paused and smiled at her, folding each of his hands around hers, "I already know you an' me, we've moved past what we used to have. An' it's not like I'm expectin' all these sparks to fly and to end up in each other's arms tomorrow night." He chuckled, the schedule of waking and sleeping had finally shifted in his mind, though the finality of such was not what caused him to laugh. It was her. Through all the years he'd known her, Alexander had never quite known what he was getting into. He'd never known what to do with her, except to love her; how to act to make her happy. Now that they were not getting married and were not bound to one another, though, he felt closer and more committed to her than ever. Not because he was in love with her...but because she was a part of himself and he, a part of her.
"We're more than lovers now, darlin'." His smile broadened and grew into that charming, toothy, boyish grin that only his face could pull off. "We're..." he paused, clearly trying to think of something witty, though all he could come up with was, "...us! My place is your place, if you ever need somewhere to go. An' you know how to find me..."
It was true. A part of Alexander, a good and healthy portion, wanted to take Ginny in for the night and feel her, love her the way he used to...but sitting there, he understood that he would be no better off than a common thug. Waiting until a woman was vulnerable and taking what was valuable to her. He couldn't do that. No matter how badly he wanted to, he had too much respect for her. Nipping a rekindled flame in the bud was the least he could do, even if he'd be kicking himself for it for the next few weeks.
Genevieve - September 15, 2010 03:20 PM (GMT)
Ginny was only ever so slightly aware of what she was actually trying to do. Was she trying to initiate something? Was she really that desperate? That lonely? Marcel rarely kissed her anymore, and when he did, it just felt like she was being crushed against marble. Alex kissed her so readily and it was warm and loving and soft...something she'd been grappling for, for weeks...maybe even months. It caused an ache deep inside her chest.
"Don't say that, Gin."
She furrowed her brow ever so slightly. She didn't know exactly what he meant. Don't say what? That she still loved him? Or that she shouldn't? She didn't know, but the way he said it sort of hurt. Or maybe she'd been hurting all along, she was just starting to notice it more than usual.
"How you feel, about me...or--or anybody, that's up to you. The only crime, Ginny, is pretending it isn't real or passin' it off like your feelings don't matter."
She just looked at him a bit somberly, but he smiled, and she felt the corners of her mouth twitch upwards. His hands folded around her own and she wondered whether they were really as warm as she thought they were, or was her mind just making that up.
"I already know you an' me, we've moved past what we used to have. An' it's not like I'm expectin' all these sparks to fly and to end up in each other's arms tomorrow night."
He chuckled...but she failed to find the humor in what he just said. If anything, it was depressing. Or maybe her perspective was skewed...she didn't know. She just knew how she felt, and right now, she wasn't feeling very good.
"We're more than lovers now, darlin'."
She blinked. Hadn't they always been? Lovers. Best friends. Sire and fledgling. Blood-bound.
He grinned again and it was enough to make her feel a little warm, not enough to make her smile in return. She was just sort of sinking. It wasn't physical, it wasn't visible, but she most certainly felt it.
"We're...us! My place is your place, if you ever need somewhere to go. An' you know how to find me..."
He didn't say anything else and after a moment, she pulled away from him. All she wanted was to be wanted, but now, every man she ever had feelings for didn't seem to want to return any of them. And maybe she was being selfish in thinking so, but she couldn't help it. He didn't want her saying that she loved him and he probably didn't even want her expressing any sort of those, until now, dormant feelings. He probably really did have someone else, he was just not telling her. Not that he didn't have the right to move on with his life, but once more, she was selfish. She didn't want him to. None of these speculations were expressed, of course.
She wanted to tell him that she needed to leave, although at the same time she didn't, because then it would seem like she was hoping for something else and since it was obvious she wasn't getting it, she wanted to take her precious time and go. That wasn't it, though. She was just finding it harder and harder to be around him when they were not on the same level of emotional distance. He seemed, from the way he talked, that he'd come to accept the things that had happened and perhaps they were for the best. He'd moved on, like he said...but Ginny was still 'what-if'ing. She had a tendency to cling to the past while simultaneously moving forward, which wasn't very healthy at all, but that was just how things were. And it made all of this unnecessarily painful.
But she couldn't ask to leave, because she didn't want him to get the wrong idea. So instead, she pulled her feet up onto the couch, wrapped her arms around her knees, and pressed the side of her face into the cushion, looking away from him. Her eyes were stinging and there was a knot in her throat, but she tried to swallow it down. "Then it's okay if I stay here for a few more hours?" The question was quiet and mumbled. At least after a few hours she'd be able to go home where Marcel would be passed out on the bed or the floor or something.