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 there's no penguins in alaska ?!, tag ;; jackie
| nikita izaak xylander |
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HAWAII will SINK if i CUT my HAIR
Group: * Embrace the End Band
Posts: 97
Member No.: 57
Joined: 10-April 09
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  It had been a grand total of two days since Nikita had last heard from Jackie until today. Two very long and painful days that were spent constantly trying to contact his ex. He knew they broke up, but that didn’t mean he couldn’t still care about Jackie, right? And he did care, he really did. Sure Nikita knew he wasn’t exactly the most caring person in the world. In fact for the most part he found emotions a waste of time and energy. He really wasn’t the kind of person you could come to with a problem and expect him to actually care. Nope, that just wasn’t the way Nikita rolled. Then suddenly all of a sudden bam he actually cared about someone. And not just cared, he actually believe it or not fell in love. And that was fucking scary shit to the boy. He had spent years in the philosophy that love simply didn’t exist, that Jackie had to waltz into his life and completely shatter that philosophy. Nikita couldn’t believe it but he actually fell in love, and that was when the problem really began. Being in an actual relationship with Jackie made it so Nikita was quick to realize just how fucked up Jackie’s self-esteem was. In a few days he heard the phrases ‘I want to die’ and ‘I’m worthless’ so many times that it became just as casual as ‘hey, how are you?’ And god, Nikita fucking hated that.
Every single word like that jabbed Nikita like a knife. He hated seeing the one person he actually care about talk so much shit about himself to the point where he actually didn’t want to live. It wounded Nikita so much, that finally he just couldn’t take it and he actually broke up with Jackie. Which ended up being the worst mistake of his life. Especially when shortly after the boy just simply vanished. Nikita of course freaked out, spent two days constantly trying to reach Jackie, and finally bam there he was online. To say he was pissed off was an understatement. Nikita was about ready to flip out about how fucking worried he was, when Jackie told him he had been getting help to deal with the drug problem so he could take better care of himself, for Nikita. After getting over the initial shock, Nikita felt well touched. He couldn’t believe that Jackie would go through something like that just because he took Nikita’s “we’re through until you get better” to heart. It didn’t take him too long to take Jackie back, because frankly two days without having Jackie was enough torture for one lifetime. And he really couldn’t live without Jackie, those two days had proved it. He needed Jackie, he really did. And that was why he was now standing in front of his room, staring at the doorknob in silence.
He hadn’t knocked or anything, he knew the door would be unlocked. It was all a matter of turning the doorknob and entering the room. But first he just need a moment to process everything that happened these past few days. He still couldn’t believe that someone like him had actually fallen in love, and as now even willing to give love a second chance. Fuck, Jackie really did mess up his mind, and yet it was being with Jackie that Nikita had felt happiest. How messed up was that? Shaking his head the blonde boy quickly opened up the door, putting on a faint smile as he entered the room. “You ok?” There, a simple a non-asshole question to ask. How bizarre.
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